Pondering

It’s amazing, so far I have written one blog, and not even 24hrs later I find myself thinking, what will my next blog be about?
Lots of things popped in and out of my head, bouncing around almost like kids jumping up and down saying “pick me! Pick me”
But in the end I decided to write about my early morning wake up.
This morning around 6:30am my gorgeous 5yo son came into me and said “Mama, I can’t sleep” I offered to take him to the toilet and then said to him “come and jump in bed between Dad and Mum and go back to sleep”
Of course he didn’t go back to sleep, but as we laid there snuggled up under the covers I thought to myself how lucky I was and how much I treasured something as simple as cuddling up to my (not so)baby boy.
I was thinking to myself that it wouldn’t be too much longer and morning cuddles in bed would be a thing of the past, for a few reasons… Firstly before much too longer he’s going to be far to big to fit in bed with Dad and Mum and secondly, he probably won’t want to! The lure of Saturday morning cartoons and Lego proving to be a far more attractive option than lying in bed pretending to be asleep.
So this morning as I cuddled him and he starting talking I didn’t sush him and try and get him to go to sleep we chatted about things super important things such as how cool a car with wings would really be, and if it would be possible to build a real car out of Lego or not, and the most important topic of all, did I know that there were more than one of “Jack and the Beanstalk” books out there?
These moments, filled with wonder and love are what make me so very proud to be a Mum. I love how his imagination works and how he links one though to another, but most of all I love the animation in his face when he is speaking.
It’s such a wonderful way to start the day.

Advertisements
By savvyannah

My first Post… To blog or not to blog, that is the Question

Gosh, there are so many things I want to blog about, some of them are random, and some are not.. and when it comes to blogging the options are endless…

so I think, my decision for now is that my personal blogging will be random topics, I’m not going to confine myself to one area.. so sit back and enjoy the ride!

 

I’m 30-ish… married with children.. one of my 3 is not biologically mine.. he lives with us 50-70% of the time, depending on how the wind is blowing is probably the easiest way to put it..

 

I love to read, and to sing… wow do I love to sing… for me a world without singing is a world without oxygen.. Sometimes I feel so vulnerable when I sing, because if you look carefully enough at me, you just might see a part of my soul.  My love of singing has been passed onto my daughter, who I might add has the voice of angel. She is so amazing and everytime I look at her I am reminded that this beautiful soul once grew inside of me.. I still marvel at that!

If I had to choose a song to say how I feel today, I think it would have to be the Negro Spiritual Song “Sometimes I feel like a Motherless child”  My relationship with my parents is what I call hard.. my husband calls it crazy… my auntie calls it unfair… when I am by myself, I call it heartbreaking.

I try and convince my husband that it doesn’t really bother me, and that it’s fine… that I’m coping.. of course he can see right through that and usually leaves me be until I’m ready to discuss it.

They live a good 3 days drive away, which thankfully means they can’t come and visit often.. My Dad is a heavy drinker, and the last time I saw Mum I have to admit she’s drinking a lot more too…. now don’t get me wrong, i’m not against drinking… but my Mother’s father died an alcoholic and I have a sister who is one as well… and I don’t understand why my parents drink when it brings out this darkness inside of them… and all they want to do is cause pain to others around them.

Now don’t panic, this isn’t going to be a poor me saga blog, but today this is what is on my mind…  and above anything else I am survivor, so no matter what is thrown at me I’m going to keep going, because my children and my husband give me all the happiness I need.

xxx

 

By savvyannah